28 December 2006

The funeral has come and gone blessed with magnificent weather through out the whole of 5 days. No sun and neither is there rain. Everyone praised that porpor, being the considerate woman she is, choose her passing date so that everyone could be there without much hassle and everything could be done smoothly.

1. School holidays
2. End year where leaves are easily acquired
3. Everything regarding the funeral would have been settled before the 30th which is the date of my aunt's and uncle's return ticket back to their respective countries, which had been bought before her death.

Going back to the old house once more brought back many childhood memories of me, my siblings and cousins playing all over the compound during school holidays, chinese new years and other festive occasions. All our 'hoitoi' sessions, power rangers impersonation, playing in the fish shop at the front of the compound owned by my uncle, and sitting around the round table at the kitchen compound talking with everyone.

It still hasn't sinked in yet that my maternal grandmother is no longer with us. I still feel like she is still in my youngest uncle's house and we will still see her if we go over to visit her or for dinner. Maybe i'm still in shock. Because everything happened so fast!

In a span of 12 days, from a healthy woman of 89 years who hasn't been in a hospital in her life because there was no serious illness with 20-20 vision, to physically bed ridden but still very alert mentally. Even until her last 24 hours, she could still recognise each and everyone of her 15 children and all of her grandchildren and greatgrandchildren.

But this is life. Every birth leads to death, and every death leads to birth. This is the circle of life. I'm sure none of us has any guilt in us for not spending enough time with her etc, for porpor has lived a long fulfilling life, and has even climbed to the top of the Great Wall of China when she was 83 years old. No point also in harping on our loss because we must let go. For only then we can truly move on.

Although i can still vividly recall the 'clingclang' of her jade bangle hitting my marble table, how she will always mumble to herself while doing her things, her habit of applying aloe vera on her skin every night before she sleeps, and how she always remembers the names of each and everyone of her grandchildren and greatgrandchildren, i will always think of these with joy. That i had the chance to meet such a wonderful strong woman, what more my very own grandmother.

May you be well and happy wherever you are right now popo!

:: The last words i said to her less than 12hrs before her death was, "Porpor, you rest ok". And rested she did. ::