::Life's Little Mystery::

life requires lots of love, and loving brings life

Sunday, February 29, 2004

Well well, finally, the results of my spm has been released. I was definitely ultimately dissapointed at the results that i had gotten. I had studied like a mad cow. I did! I guess this is what happens when you don't study consistently and only rush for the last train at the very last minute. Regretted with every single nerve of my body. Anyhow, at least i didn't fail nor had gotten any Es. Thankfully. But somehow, i still feel really embarassed. My sis had gotten straight As for her stpm, and people who knows us, will be like:

them: Sue Ann, how did you do for your stpm?
sis : 4As.
them: Straights? Wow! That's very good!! (finally notices me) Sue Lynn, what about you? how did you do for your spm?
me : Erm, not good. 4As only.
them: Oh...(Awkward pause) Nevermind, it's ok. (smiles sympatheticly)

What a toll that does to my self-esteem! I feel like i'll always be in my sister's shadow. Studies wise. I want to be better and do better. I do, i really do. But, i just can't.
I have told myself over and over again this afternoon that it is not the end of the world and my parents are not even disappointed at me. Well, maybe not much since i have always been a mediocre student, i would just have to start working harder in my college and uni life and learn not to waste time and to study more consistently.

So people reading, you be the witness, - 'I promise to study as consistently as i can and not let my studies go downhill in the times to come where ever i might be. I will strive to not be a naive, not thinking child anymore. I am going to grow up and work hard for my future!'.
I will try, i really will.

Thursday, February 26, 2004

Playing badminton is really fun! Considering the long period of time that i have not done sports, my limbs are hurting me. But, who cares? It is fun! Playing at a outdoor court in a field is not nearly as fun as playing in an indoor court. As you have to put up with the constant unruly winds and horny motorcyclists who will stop by the field to watch you play. How uncomfortable. Nevertheless, in the comforts and joy of being with your friends, you will kind of overlook all these. And just enjoy the enjoyable workout.
I guess, that will be my new hobby for now besides sleeping. Fun!

Thursday, February 19, 2004

I have been feeling really lazy this few days. Don't know why. I just don't have the desire to go out, move about, shop, hang out, what-so-ever. All i feel like doing, is just sleep, watch tv, slouch around. Heck, i don't even feel like eating. What the hell is wrong with me? This must be the lazy-to-bones syndrome.
Anyway, i am too lazy to continue blogging.
So, later!

Sunday, February 15, 2004

Valentine's day could not be more beautiful and perfect.

Baby picked me up at seven-thirty. Drove around to find a decent place to have dinner. Went to The Ship first, there were swarms of people there waiting to get a table, then drove over to Victoria's Station, that place was worst, we couldn't even drive through. So, we decided to call his sis, as she was eating in San Fransisco Steak House, and she told us that there will be tables for two at 9. It was already eight-thirty that time, we didn't really want to wait till nine, so we drove back to The Ship being hopeful that there won't be as many people as there were. Reached there, found this really nice parking and happily walked there, the place was worst than it was before. My poor baby was frus to tears. It was nine o'clock and we have not had our dinner yet. Drove all the way to SF Steak House and guess what, without reservation we would have to wait till it was ten-thirty. What a hope-crasher! We were already at the verge of giving up when his sister recommended a place called Basque Lane in Mont Kiara. We went there, praying that there will be tables available. As neither of us has been there, we don't know how that place would be like. But when we reached there, gosh, that place was so much better than the rest. There weren't that many people and the atmosphere there was superb! So you could say that all the hard work of finding a place paid off. And there, we had a blast!

Baby bought me a box full of forever friends bear with the letters of i love you stitched on each and every one of them. Me, being my kaypo self, pestered him to tell me the place he bought that from, and after alot of pestering and mogok-ing, he told me he bought them from singapore. Apparently, he saw the bears on the internet and the only place to buy them was there so he drove all the way to Singapore in the middle of the night with matt, and reached there in the morn to search for the place told the guy what he wanted to be stitched on, bought them and drove all the way back here. I was shocked to the bones when i knew, i never ever had anyone went all the way to some place that far just to get me a present. I was touched. Compared to the cologne i gave him, his, is priceless.

Sunday, February 08, 2004

Happy Birthday Reenie darling!! *muaks!* =)

Surfed the friendster and checked out other people's pictures as i was rather bored today. Was looking at this particular girl's friendster, and this girl happens to be my boy's ex lovergirl, mind you. Looking at her pictures gave me a weird feeling, jealousy i guess. All sorts of crazy thoughts soon clouded my mind and filled my insecure self with doubts. It made me think, she's this attractive girl whom he sees in college everyday, and i am this worn-out old hag who gets on his nerve often enough with all these. I know i don't have anything to worry about as my baby is the greatest boyfriend a girl could ever have and i know that he would never cheat on me. *touches wood* he better not! But even so, i am still afraid that history will repeat itself. I've been hurt too many times in the past, it is just so hard for me to drop all my doubts no matter how many times i assure myself. This hurts him, as he thinks that i do not trust him. I do, it is just that, i don't know, it is just me and my insecurities. I always have this silly thinking that he will somehow, oneday or another leave me and go back to that girl or simply just fall for her again. How do i make this crazy thinking of mine go away? I seriously am going crazy.

My health has been deteoriating. Been having a really bad sore throat for a week and the dizzy spell keeps hitting me. It's bad enough with the sore throat as i cant eat alot of food which i really love and crave like chocolates, chips and so on. sniff* sniff*.. I can just sit put at the dining table eating away happily and just feeling dizzy all of a sudden. Plus, my sinus has been really terrible too. I can feel the pressure in my nose, and sometimes, the pressure's so big till my nose hurts and that usually brings about a splitting headache. Can't imagine what is wrong with me, don't know what's my problem. The price to pay when you're getting older. =p

This whole entry has been filled with my whinings. Hope that you won't get tired of me after reading this.

Friday, February 06, 2004

YAyyy!!! I passed my driving test!! haha..shi en, i'm faster than you now! =p

Nothing much happened since the last entry. Maybe it is due to the fact that i am such a lifeless scum. Is it me or what? The weather is extremely hot to the max. Scalding my already dark skin into another tint of colour wherever i go. Me and my cuz were just talking about it the other day and he suggested that if he has power and money, he would just cage up the whole world and air-condition it. Not a bad idea though, but if one person from just one small corner of the earth falls sick or came down with a flu, the whole world would just catch it too.
My little cousin who is in my old primary school, told me that the whole primary school is now air-conditioned! Can you believe two freakin air-cons in one standard class room. How lucky is that? Little kids nowadays. tsk tsk*

Tuesday, February 03, 2004

Life, is a weird and crazy thing. It either drives you crazy with madness or crazy with happiness. You can never be contented with life and the things you have. Neither has anyone succeeded in being satisfied in whatever they have. What is it that sends us all craving for the things we don't have and wanting the things other people has? Bear with me as i've reached a stage where i am constantly finding for answers i know i won't get. Just my stupidity with added curiousity. Crappy.

Spend the whole day yesterday with my boy. We were supposed to go catch a movie but didn't as there weren't any nice movie except the last samurai. I didn't want to get squeezed and claustrophbic in that crowded cinema and die in the midst of watching a not so worth it show. That's what i think. So my poor baby had to accompany me while i shop and shop and shop till we gave in to our hurting legs. In the end, we went to his place and watch a cantonese movie by the name of Love Undercover, which was not all that bad. I prefer watching movies in each others houses compared to the cinema as we can lie down comfortably on each other and cuddle all we want in the comforts of our home. This is one thing even the best sound systems in the cinemas can't beat. Don't you all agree with me?

Monday, February 02, 2004

I have finally stopped working! Yeah! Feels so good to wake up in the morn and not worry about whether i'm late or not. Heavenly! Now, i am just waiting to collect my cheque so that i can go do the shopping i was supposed to do before chinese new year. Nevermind. Better late than never eh? There is alot of things that i want to buy, but i just don't know where to start.

Here's what i have to get.

1. New levis
2. Shoes ( still undecided )
3. Handbag / slingbag ( preferably a red handbag )
4. Valentines day present! ( urgh..help me girls! )
5. More tops.
6. Skirts
7. My highlights.

That's about all i can think of for now. Pretty basic stuff. I think i thought of more the other day but i just can't remember what. Shoot!

All for now.